August 21, 2000

21 August 2:45 a.m.

Driving home tonight on the interstate in a thunderstorm during a torrential downpour. when trucks zoomed by, the water shot up over my truck . it was like driving through a river. I drove over an hour like this with my flashers on barely able to see the road or what was around me.

My shoulders are still full of tension. Is there anyone out there who will give me a back massage? I feel like I’m wearing this tension. It is a living thing attached to my back, shoulders, and neck.

When I get home, an hour and a half later, the storm has left my area and there is a fresh and gentle wind moving the tree tops and I stand in my driveway and close my eyes and listen to the crickets and the cicadas and sense the full psychedelic effect of that incredible ‘sensurround’ sound. The tones mixed by the breeze stimulate part of the brain and it sounds ancient and alien and disconcerting – as it sounds comforting.

I have a strong sense of aloneness ; a strong sense of myself tonight. And a strong sense of history and the knowledge that all of the emotions I have felt in the past have come and gone.

They are gone.

And the time has come to put together another show for New York !