August 22, 2002 01:25 AM
Back from Los Angeles. travel time from the moment I left the house in L.A. to the moment I walked into my door here in Atlanta = 14 hours ! Slept most of the day in total exhausted bliss . So now it is back to work and preparations for my show in Porto, Portugal. Bill Rieflin arrives soon from Seattle and we begin rehearsals here at the house. It is very warm in Atlanta compared to Los Angeles. But I love the swampy atmosphere here – Maybe because I was born in Mississippi and have so many memories of thick bamboo forests and steamy bayou. Tonight when I went outside I noticed two huge spiders swinging in their shared web by the door. Don’t think I ‘ve ever seen spiders share a web before ! This time of year there are huge spiders in the South and a constant chime of cicadas and crickets. I don’t use air-conditoning so I open all the screened windows and let this sound come in all summer long. This last trip to L.A. was again one of self discovery – truly learning about myself . This experience opened me to realizations of a possibilty that I forget when I get involved with the humbling aspects of daily existence, human relations, & defining myself forgetting all the other “selves” inside this life… William Faith was an excellent engineer for the songs for this project (as yet unnamed) with Neurosis. He will perform on guitar with me in San Francisco in November. A tall muscular young man accosted me in the parking lot of the grocery store tonight where I had made a quick spontaneous trip. He was clearly a smooth “scam artist” but it startled me and reminded me of mortality. .. how when you least expect it someone could pull out a gun, etc. ..I have felt for awhile now that I was viewing life from behind a screen. This happened years ago. Even when the harsh aspects of life enter and take an ugly turn, I remain in this shielded sphere. It has not been this way my whole life. Only for the past several years. I wonder if this is a phenomena experienced by others and if they also noticed its introduction and takeover of previous consciousness.