February 18, 2004

February 18, 2004 01:06 AM

For me, it has always been natural to allow myself time for whimsey. There are people who swear by a life of regimen. As long as it allows for dreaming, the spirit *as you define it* can thrive. “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” was a saying I heard as a child. I was encouraged to develop my creative side as a child even though expectations ran high for me to be pragmatic and down to earth. I came from a “pitch in” value system in my family . This meant many chores and errands. To pitch in meant that everyone was simply expected to take the initiative and do work for the household. Taking initiative and not waiting to be asked or told what to do was rewarded in my family. This means that you are over- functioning throughout your life , however, if you interact with persons who have not lived with this approach to “team playing.” I have been an “over-functioning” woman and I have a hard time now even accepting acts of thoughtfulness or gifts. I am so overwhelmed by those things that I am elated. I do not expect gifts of any kind so when they come, I am speechless to put it mildly. The best acts of kindness make no demands in return. My interest now is in allowing myself the joy that comes with acts of generosity towards me without needing those things to find approval for my own worth.

on becoming A F W.