February 27, 2006 12:37 AM
i’m working hard. personalizing items for things ordered from this site and the Swans site, rehearsing with Renee, doing my best to hold down the fort. i’m very aware of the choices i have made in my life and the dues paid and the sacrifices made. i am also very aware of those who are revealing themselves as my true friends and those who had insincere intentions. it is a weeding out process and i am happy to make my life leaner and more insulated from the jackals. the biggest challenge i have as an artist is to continually tap my imagination and open it fully. it doesn’t open upon my willful command. it opens for the muse only. courting that muse, my true lover, is the dance i have to continually relearn. the music keeps changing and the dance steps respond to the tempo and color of the music. when i return from Spain, i will work with: Cedric, Byla, Cobalt, Jesu, Blood Promise, and form and record my new band : The Sweet Meat Love And Holy Cult, AND record the next Jarboe solo album. I will play more dates in Canada and Russia and Eastern Europe. The Conduit (with guitarist Nic Le Ban) goes into general release this spring. i am proud of this album . To all the bitter energy out there , I say this: pursue your creative desires and forget the restraints that hold you back and stoke the fire of resentment in your heart. It takes COURAGE to be an artist/musician. It is a thankless and hard path. Stop whining. Do good WORK.